Saturday 12 July 2014

Not a laugh in the bath

I have a new ploy to get my children into the bath each night, because it was becoming too much like hard work.

After requesting nicely, in my calmest voice, for each of the older ones to get in the bath last night, I waited and waited and...waited.

"Yeah hang on, in a minute," was all that I got.

I asked again, drumming my fingers. Then I instructed. Then I ordered.

Then I screeched a little. But I hate screeching. 

Yet still, no one was listening and my blood was starting to boil.

So I left them both in the living room, went upstairs, grabbed my new Prima magazine which I still hadn't had chance to read, added more bubbles to the tub,  stripped off and decided to indulge in some serious sud soaking.

"Ah! This is the life," I thought to myself as I reclined and turned the first page of my glossy mag.

Within three minutes I was interrupted by both children, who demanded to know where I was, what I was doing and "why the heck" was I in the bath.

I made them wait for me to have a ten minute bath...not quite as long as I had anticipated...and then finally each of them got in. 

Me skulking off to have quiet Me Time is a guaranteed way of getting them to do as I ask.

It reminds me of a few weeks ago. Both of the older children were watching mindless TV, Bondi Rescue, as I recall (actually that is a rather guilty pleasure of mine too, gotta love a bit of the lifeguards Hoppo, Chappo and Whippet tearing through the surf to save a life). Anyway I digress.

A few weeks ago I decided to run a long, luxurious bath with my gorgeous Ren rose oil while the kids were busy lolling about downstairs.

With a lavish hand I swirled plenty of the expensive rose oil in the water, climbed in and bathed in seventh heaven.

For thirty whole seconds.

Suddenly out of nowhere the Prince appeared, tearing his clothes off.

"WOAH, what are you doing?" I demanded.

But before he could answer, he was already in the bath with me, thrashing around like a slippery eel.

Then he smiled with a self satisfied face and uttered those dreaded words.

"I have just done a wee."

I was out of that water faster than Tom Daley dives in. 

The Prince then looked at me and said "Mum, can I get out now please? The water smells of stupid roses".

You couldn't make it up. I guess I will look back on all this and laugh one day. Probably.

In other news, I haven't been cherry tree shopping this week as have been very busy but I did get my hair done which only happens once in a blue moon.

I am not a fan of the selfie these days as think it looks very smug, but man, if you had seen my hair before this, I was like an 80s throwback. And not in a good way.


Jay said...

Your hair looks great, I never do selfies, I just don't get it!
I think you've cracked it with the bathtime routine, that would have worked for mine when they were that age. Now we have an 18 year old showering twice a day and a 15 year old who doesn't wash (the 11 year old little miss doesn't have to be told anything twice)- the 15 year old is too big to man handle into the bathroom!

Jennydee said...

Just reminds of the Jill Murphy book 5 minutes peace .Also reminds me of my the time my 3 year old daughter was sharing a bath and pooed in it! Amazingly they are 9 now and still friends!

Sarah said...

Ahhhh, Gem I remember the days when both my boys would get in the bath with me!! I can hardly believe we fit!!

Your hair is gorgeous - I miss your face!!


S x

April May said...

you are hilarious! i just love you!
Congrats on the new babba by the way (im wayy behind, sorry) she's absolutely beautiful xxx lotsa love to you and yours! :-)