Running (ok limping) on empty

I have been rattling around on various drugs all week. I've done my back in while packing, I'm on tension headache pills, drinks to soothe my tum, on co codamol and naproxen for my back pain, not touched the Diazepam yet although the doc prescribed it for me (hello, I am in sole charge of two kids, a glass of vino makes me weird), I am on antibiotics for a painful whitlow on my finger and I've, quite frankly, had enough.

My house doesn't really feel like my house anymore. Not that it ever was as we rent it, but it did feel like home for 18 long, blissful months. The landlord left us to our own devices and we enjoyed the space, the garden, our family life. Now it is empty, with an echo.

Now it just feels like someone else's home, someone who is itching to move in and extend it and get fab new curtains and carpets and paint for it. My throat lump is pretty intense right now.

It's been rotten since I hurt my back, not helped by the fact I put a bag of frozen peas down my pants to soothe the inflammation and they burst and made my tights all wet while I was at work (yes, I pea-d my pants). Then I had to see the physio five minutes after (wearing the same wet tights) who happened to be young and fit. Oh the horror. Going back to see him this Thursday so will possibly work harder on my choice of underwear and avoid peas in my pants.......

I've left my very part time (ie 6 hours a week job) as a dental receptionist. No more root canal banter. Ahem.

"Yes we can book you in for Tooth Hurty, no problem.....mwaahhhhh!"

So the job is finished and the house is in chaos, we've packed loads but everywhere is filled with itty bitty bits and I hate it.

Yes the TV is older than my daughter and no I am not kidding!!!!!

We have Tues, Wed and Thurs and then that's it. Removal men come at 8am on Friday. Then I will no longer be a Royal Berkshire Bird.

I've loved it here and wow, I've known who my friends are. One is taking me out for breakfast tomorrow, loads joined me for my leaving drinks do (I was high on painkillers), one made me this awesome present;

which is made up of all the places I've loved to visit in the village (she gathered paper bags and leaflets from each one), some clubbed together to buy me a John Lewis voucher and I've had some lovely presents. People are already booking in to come and stay. It's lovely. These people are the ones I shall stay in touch with, they mean so much to me. There are two friends I saw three times last week because we couldn't bear to say goodbye, so have kept prolonging it. Now it's getting silly.

The Prince said goodbye to his friends, including the "Candle Twins". The mum and I met on a train to London when I was visiting KMMMS after Taya was born. We've been friends ever since.

 And I've come to realise our shoe pile has really stressed me out.

It literally goes on for miles and miles

And I don't own one pair of  f*** me shoes. I always go for comfort. Shame!

Pack it in

The house is resembling Cardboard City. It no longer feels warm and cosy. It's making me sad that all our happy memories can never be relived. We will never experience spring with all the pink blossom that scattered like confetti, the pale pink wisteria that crept around the pergola and shaded us in the summer will still be here, but we won't be the ones enjoying it.

Having friends round for impromptu food, watching the children play on the wooden play equipment that was here when we moved in. All these things I will miss. I ache to take "Chester" the cat with us. But alas, he too isn't ours. He's just a regular visitor. And it makes me very sad that the Prince won't remember his happy days here.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, the packing has commenced. Here I am tired, frizzy haired, sporting my own design in run mascara, stressed,  a little shouty with the children for unpacking what I've packed. Not my finest hour.

But two weeks today, we will have left this leafy village, where every one knows everyone. It's bordering on incestuous but whilst it drove me mad, I bet I shall miss it when I don't know a single soul.
So here is an update on the past week in pictures:

Living in a box

The husband is tackling the Prince's room

Which led to me counting my cherry tree stash of ladybird books!

121 books in total!!!

Which were your favourites?

Gotta love vintage Smoke and Fluff....

 In between packing we cheered as the kids ate properly with knives and forks (albeit in the wrong hands)

Hmm, someone should ALWAYS eat this way...

 We fitted in a lovely family walk

The husband reached the ripe old age of 39. I remember whisking him off to New York for his 23rd. Magical. This year he worked and I wished we were back in NYC snogging and skating,

It was only a matter of time with journalists as parents that the Prince found his perfect reading material:

He then took it upon himself to read a bedtime story to his eight year old sister.

Then yesterday we went back to the place that will be our home in two weeks time:

I wore my cosy red cherry tree coat. My lovely nanny (who died nearly two years ago) bought it from Help the Aged (originally Debenhams) and never wore it. I think of her every time I put it on.

Cherry tree coat £10. Cherry tree bag £2.50.

At the park on the beach

And I am excited about moving on and starting again. But I've realised I will be leaving behind some dear friends. A few months ago I posted about feeling I didn't have many friends. I was wrong. I have realised that during these stressful times, my true friends in the village have come forward. They will be sorely missed (but are already booking up to come and stay so it can't be all bad!)

Hoping tomorrow is just as glorious weather wise so we can sneak out for a walk and a break from packing.